I run because…

I’ve tried running/being a runner for a long time. Long story short, it never ended up working out. Let’s just say I’ve never enjoyed running, and running just isn’t my thing. Even at this point in my ‘running career’, I would not consider myself as a runner.Just think about it: you are running, from point A to point B, and for what? Best case scenario, you end up at a finish line. But usually, you end up exactly where you started – home, and when on a treadmill, you don’t even move! And nothing happens, except you travel a distance and have to take a shower (as opposed to sports, where you win/lose, or dance, or just about anything else.). So for a long time, it’s confused me on why it’s so popular and how you can possibly be ‘addicted to running’.
I’ve tried finding lots of different types of exercise. (I’m working on a LoveRunningpost coming soon about a little bit of that history.) It has to be fun, energetic, the people have to be nice, and there should be cool music too. Most sports had too much commitment, and things like running or just ‘going to the gym’ had no accountability or routine. I found Zumba, which was terrific, but then I went to college. They have Zumba, but who wants to pay for anything? So, after a lot of experimenting, I figured running just a tiny bit wouldn’t be so bad, so I tagged a 10-minute indoor run on to my workouts at the gym. By the end of the year, I could run about 10 minutes continuously – a little more than a mile, if I wanted to.
Then, I was talking with my friend Emma. Just the term ‘runner’ has such a cool and athletic connotation with it (at least, to me). We both expressed the desire to do a 5K sometime later this year. And then what? We decided we’d train up and do one this fall. It’s doable – a 5K is 3.1 miles long, and I can run a little more than 2 miles at present. So if I keep running and training through the summer, by mid-October, I should be golden. Right? Mmm… kinda. I still didn’t have a why. I need a firm, unyielding why to do something I dislike.

Purple… is a color I never particularly liked. There was a girl who went to my elementary and middle school who was obsessed with purple. It was on every outfit she wore, and when I visited her house, all over her room. Everything was purple. To me, though, it’s not really my thing. Until I found that the color for epilepsy awareness is purple. You know – how pink is for breast cancer and stuff? Purple is for epilepsy. So when I run a 5k this fall, I’ll be wearing purple and I’ll be running for epilepsy. (Though I still have to buy a purple shirt – as of now, I still don’t own one!)



And then I started like to run. Well, not really. I still only like the feeling after I run. While I run, I can feel anything from a heat stroke to legs about to fall out to an adrenaline rush to utter and complete and utter exhaustion I just need to stop a moment thanks to self-consciousness from the haters. So while I miss it when I haven’t run for a while (that due to the fact I can’t find a more regular easy athletic activity to do), sometimes I just run to get home.

It’s funny, though. The more I run, the less I run for myself. I’m not on a team, and my only accountability is the 5K. But the more fit I feel, the ‘easier’ it gets (if you can say that), the less is in it for me. It’s funny though. I started out running mostly because I would feel super out of shape and this would make me feel a little better. Now, I feel better about myself – but now, there is more in it for causes my own goal of feeling and looking better. Of course, I can’t lie, it’s true: I do run to get home sometimes. Once I’ve gotten out the door, I might as well finish, right? And you’re only going to get that post-run feeling if you actually do the run. But sometimes, I run for more than that. I run for epilepsy.



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